I wake up with reluctance to go back to Bangalore that night, for two reasons, one - because of the guilt of not having utilised the vacation properly.More than the guilt of not having done anything, You don't want people to know you did almost nothing, when you actually planned to do lots.Two - it is same old routine from the next day, and same standard reply "NO TIME" to do anything that you want to do.It is not always that you get a chance to go on a vacation for 10 days, when your work demands you to be at office for at least 14 hours a day.
Scene before vacation: I am too excited about the break as I badly needed one. Everyone on this earth gets to know about my vacation Cos of the excitement. I decided to use this vacation, to spend time with nature, to rekindle a lost interest, nurture a new skill,spend time with children and loved ones, go to some remote village and understand their life style.The main reason for excitement of course is the thought that you don't have to wake up early just to avoid traffic and rush in BMTC bus, you don't have to fear about missing deadlines, you can eat good food :), talk to friends for looong hours.
As always, the plan was just in mind and did not materialize. Ten days was crunched to 4 days, I had to wake up early on all four days, as my Mom considers it a taboo, to sleep till late in the morning during Dussera, princeton prep ended up with solution to four problems(I had planned to complete the entire book on vacation), no jungle, no adventure, no learning, not much of talking too. Only food was close to meeting the expectation.
Feeling bored and tired of answering people that I did nothing much during the vacation, and justifying my laziness and indecisiveness with an excuse that, it was just four days and not ten days as planned, I open your official inbox, only to be surprised to see that number of unread emails and decide that I have to spend the whole day to sort my mails, solve the issues, and start running the marathon again. I call my friend and decide to vent out my anger and frustration, only to find him busy.
Without an option I start reminiscing the past and realising the present, eventually ending up with the question, "what is the basic ingredient, for a happy living?". I come up with this as an answer. Having spent my entire life till now tied to my Mom's apron string, a year of separation was definitely a big deal for me. New friends, new team, new city, new office, new culture, a new life and a new start was the scene seventeen months back. Now, I run errands, do the daily chores, manage work, keep myself entertained, miss home a great deal and sob sob, mange to pay my bills on the last day,I teach kids, I manage to be there for my friends when they need me. The multitude tasks of looking after myself and career, and i seem to manage it pretty well. The best thing about our country is, it is full of nice people, who care and value a person.
A smiling good morning wish, a tasty breakfast with Dosa and Sambar, good teammates at work, a healthy conversation with a friend, delicious lunch, traffic less road, a conversation narrating the day's activities with a dear one, satisfaction derived out of helping someone, trying out new skills, fulfilling dinner and a good night sleep without dreams. These are the bare necessities of happy living. My basic necessities are mostly met. There is just one thing missing, which has left a hole. So, I am now happy to be fortunate according to my list and pray for that good night's sleep and crash on my bed hoping for a smiling good morning wish 2mrw :).
