One Year!!! :)(:

Yipee!! It is one year since I came to Blore . A year I would always cherish. Like I have told before in a post earlier, I have no idea yet (I thought I knew why sometime back, but it is uncertain again at the moment :)) why I decided to leave my home, my family and come to a land of strangers. But anyway am surprised and amazed by the fact that I withstood it. I think I have accepted the change gradually. It's unbelievable that one year flew past ( it sound like a cliche ), and along with the journey transformed me completely to what I am today, from what I was a year before.For instance, the very thought of having done anything great would have ideally crusaded me, and made me do something. But now, I have this attitude, "I think it is okay not to do anything :)(again, not to forget the smile)".

Certain memories refuse to leave you because they leave permanent impressions which are rather impossible to get rid of.Reminiscence of the past is both amusing as well as distressing.Now, when I think about the last one year of my life ( I know am making it sound like the program year program that is shown on 1st day of a new year, every year in every other channel). Reminiscing and running the movie "One Year", with me as the protagonist, scripted, edited and directed by the universal director, and other actors who played their part impeccably, I have mixed kind of feelings (hence the title:)(: ). My blog, becoming more like a diary, I have decided to maintain it as diary itself. So, introducing some of the important characters, of my movie (it will be being unfair to myself, if I use the word drama instead ), who mostly brought that small crescent on my face, and some times knowingly or unknowingly the precious pearls in my eyes.

I landed in blore, confounded, with a blank idea of the future, assuring myself that it would be a short stay, and that I could go back home any day.I was stranded in the airport, not knowing of where to go (I was supposed to go to this place called Brookefield, which did sound like a place in London and not in Blore to many), with a heavy heart and fear of "How am I going to be in this big black blore" (I was black as I came at 9 in the night). Adding to my fear was this language problem. The only sentence I knew in Hindi was, "Mujhe book lagrahe hai", which my friends at cognizant taught me. With great difficulty, I managed to reach the guest house, and then immd., :)(: for some reason. I met this guy, JD who was like a ray of hope in the dark jungle, where I was lost then.

* JD - my first friend in blore, who was there when no one else was here for me. He was like a kutty kid, though he is extremely mature and responsible for his age. He made me smile from the heart, for the first time in blore. Not to forget the tough times I had with him. He literally made me cry and learn Hindi. Whatever little Hindi I know today, is all because of him. Thanks to him :). We are not in touch now for no reason :( . I thank my caretaker Bhayya also, who took good care of me at the guest house.Thanks!! Bayya :)

* Imran - This funny guy, is an epitome of friendship. I feel lucky to have met him. He is funny, because he is (Am sure he is gonna kill me for this :)) . He can make you laugh 24X7. Amazing friend!! Thanks monkey! - still in touch with him.

* Raju - very mature and a level headed friend of mine. He know what he wants to do ( unlike me). A nice friend, who is still there, when I need him.

* Rakesh, Raj - my first Tamil speaking friends in blore. I always feel at home when I talk to them, may be because of the language. ( hardly talk to them now though)

* Vanessa, Gagan, Rahul, Arup Bhayya - good friends at SAP.

* Pratyusha - My ex-roomie, who is more like me, tried hard to teach me a few things, but in vain, as am not a good student. :)

* Anirudh - My best friend (:) am forced to say), a better version of me, extremely patient, adroit, a warm and caring person. If there is someone I troubled in the whole of last one year, it is only him. Most of my memories in blore revolve around him. I could just be myself with him.

* Sripriya - my first friend in oracle. A caring chammatu ponnu. Pari - a patient listener. I mostly vent out all my offcial worries to her (my PL :))

* Shiva, Vinod, Anand, LK - The late hours gang. We discuss about all trivial things, considering it to be the topic of the hour.

* Raghu - My driving Guru, and rival in Badminton . A level headed person, who is very practical and realistic.

* Kamsi - A warm person, my pub partner :)

* Bobby - My manager, who is more like a good friend. I like to fight with him, talk to him, argue with him. A very balanced person, who can manage everything. Unknowingly, I look up to him for a few things.

* Tina - She is a darling friend, who is equally stupid and sensitive as me. I guess she will be the only soul who reads this post. We share a common world. I am surprised with the way she manages everything. A caring, loving and lovable person. I miss her a lot if she doesn't turn up even for a day.

 

*Hari - Power programmer, Sincere soul, amicable, harmless, friendly person. My ADF Guru. Tolerates me with a smile.

* Megha - My darling ex-roomie. She is married now. Next to my mom, she is the only soul on this earth who can understand all my actions, and read my tone. My best friend, who is always there for me.

* Kids @ my school - I love them. They changed my world. They made me smile. They taught me the lesson of life.They grooved me to the person I am today.

* My soft toys & plants - They are the ones always with a smile to listen to my cribs. They break my aloofness. Give me hope many times. Sadly, my plants died:(

* Books - They played a major role in the transformation. My best friends of late.

* My Lappy - None like you sweetie. You are the best. She has seen all my emotions and has been listening patiently, at any hour. She has made me strong and wise. ( it is a she, as I always feel, girls are more sensitive and caring than guys)

* Jayanagar 4th 'T' block Park, 9th block park, Ragigudda, Woodys, Prasidhi, Bhavani (my fav hangouts :))

Few more ppl and things are yet to be mentioned, but I feel sleepy at this late hour in night or early hour in the morning, am not sure of.

There are few memories which made me happy and few more that made me sad, but one

thing is for sure, I have learnt to be alone, to live in my own world. I was forced to rather.

Should I thank those responsible for it ? :)

Life has taught me myriad lessons, but it has also thrown umpteen questions unanswered yet.

P.S

* I could now manage doing, work, cooking, going to school, talking to friends, reading , writing, learning, listening, getting and giving update from and to ppl at home, counsel, research, wash, clean, workout( this is all that I could remember doing) on a single day. I am amazed by it, considering the fact that, I was such a lazy person, who wanted her mom to be around feeding her breakfast, and help her get ready to work.

* I wanted to learn Swimming and Tennis in this one year which I haven't done yet. Will do it soooooon.

* By next year, I plan to visit most of the jungles around blore , want to be with nature, they never hurt you. :)

Wedding Bells!!

I hear Wedding bells all around. Lot of my friends are entering into wedlock. I attended several weddings over the past couple of months that i am exhausted and bored to attend them anymore. I am not excited about weddings for various reasons. Firstly, am partially motivated to wear a Saree, as I don't want to be the odd person. On attempting to do so, I fail miserably. My walk was like a march of the penguin. I feel hundreds of eyes looking at me, but sadly not because I look gorgeous, but because I walk like a penguin. Secondly, most of my friends are in US that I feel am the only person attending every other person's wedding. If you find the commonality in the weddings, it is just one thing, guess what?? - my face in at least one of the photos of their wedding album. Thirdly, am bored or confounded to choose a wedding gift. Finally, and most importantly, it is because, I hate this question, "So, when is your marriage? ". How does my wedding matter to everyone including those whom I never knew existed?. Worse is the situation, if you attend a relatives wedding with your family. If you are not smart, it could turn out to be your own engagement, even without your knowledge. You might get engaged to the son/daughter of your second aunt's third cousin's fourth daughter's fifth son (if you are girl ), who is currently in US, with a profession, none other than software engineering. Basically, your Mom might have met that second aunt's friend in this wedding you are attending with your family, for the first time that day.

All this apart, this is all what I see in weddings।Its a slightly funny sight indeed, the bride(my friends) draped in colorful saree and loaded with loud jewellery,posing like models for a jewellery advertisement, surrounded by a bunch of married ladies, all spewing loads of advice (am sorry gals, forgive me for such a comment :( ). It is only in their weddings, that I realise how rich my friends are, and their extreme patience to listen and follow everything they are asked to do. I wonder if I have to face the same.Yesterday, I attended one of my friends wedding.As i stood in corner staring at her, and feeling happy seeing that glow on her face attributed by the close up smile, I was transported three years back. While I felt nostalgic, about the college days, the funny talks that we had, the innocent me, the teacher friends,(They will be amazed by my gandha knowledge now :). Thanks to my cognizant friends). I must accept that I was close to a nerd in college, and didn't enjoy much. I was pouring into technical magazines and books and fundoo projects. I was later told by one of my friends that, according to most of them in my college, "I am a geek, techie, stubborn, kinda arrogant, newton, head-strong, ambitious" . I wonder if any of these adjectives will match me now. None I guess. I just hear people now say, "stupid, immature and sensitive". Few of my friends still feel, I might not get married, and are surprised and don't believe me for what I am currently. Have I changed? who or what brought the change? Is the change for good?I am invariably questioned about myself by my soul. Answers to these in the next post ( if I can find them)।

Last week, I was on a serious discussion with one of my friends about marriage. I forgot to tell you that, my standard answer to the standard question, " how do you want your husband to be? " is, " He should be of my types (not to forget the smile :) )".My types - a guy who is caring, sharing, loving, easy-going , understanding, a techie, someone who is passionate about whatever he does. (The list is long actually. Let me keep it short here). He immediately summarised saying the following," as in someone who gives his girl enough space., and not bothered about money. Whoa!! where will you ever find someone like this?? Poor lil girl, are you really unaware of the acute shortage of such men. Don't you think it is practically impossible to find a human with such traits??" (He is a guy too :)). Being disappointed with such a reply, I agreed to ponder on this and get back to him.

Here is the result of my deep thought process। I feel, every man believes he is smart, and yes, he is caring, he cares for someone whom, he has just started seeing, because he needs time pass, and as far as Sharing is concerned, he is ever ready to share his restaurant bills, easy-going until she agrees for everything that he says, and keeps him happy. If in the process of decision making of whether give her a wife status or not, if something goes wrong, or if she doesn't meet his expectations ( just by one or two qualities), this is what happens, "Gud Morning! , Gud Night!, how was your day?, shall we meet today? what are you doing?" - which was so important then, seems very trivial now. He would have made at least 10 phone calls on an average in a week, then, but now he will answer one of the 100 calls that she makes, just to say, "am busy". He wouldn't have been shy to say, "I love you" then, but, now feels shy to say, "I do not want to lose your friendship, due to misunderstandings". The girl is now, finally given a chance to know that the relationship has turned to friendship, and her boyfriend is now supposed to be her close friend, (though not physically and mentally close any more). The guy sees the next girl, and the girl, if not that very outgoing types, sees the future shattering her hopes. This is not an exaggeration. I have seen this happen to few of my friends :).

Jokes apart, Its a decision of a life-time। I have seen several relationship flounder this way and there is absolutely no space for compromise.Most of my friends say that you have to accept it and move on. But, why should the girl be punished for loving, caring, being committed and considering him to be her whole world. Shouldn't he be punished for using her like an object and throwing her away after use, or when he finds a better one, like selling the used, old car, when you buy a new bigger car, as you get a hike.Am surprised by the way the society treats these gals. The gals are categorised into three types. The girl who is badly hurt and is not able to forget him ( love has the power to turn the world upside down) - emotional idiots (Guys!! if the gals and ladies in your family, do not have this emotion and sensitivity, you cant be a family).Type two - the gals who take it with ease and try to gradually settle down - Sensitive stupids ( you are just a stupid and not an idiot because you finally leave that guy anyways) . Type three - leave the guy immediately and look for another one - flirt (if the guy does the same, he is being practical). Such is the situation, even with the so called, street-smart, stubborn, bold, arrogant, sharp girl :). After having understood and analysed the scenario, I agree with my friend and tell him, " hopes to find someone of my types, is like waiting for Mr. Prince Charming to come for me, riding his horse". At the same time, experiences have made me uncomfortable and shy away from marriage. To my close friends, I say, "As there is no Mr. Prince Charming,I will live with my kid Vismaya ( the gal baby whom I will adopt) and we will be there for each other". They think, I am in crazy mode now.

Anyway, none of my close friends had to meet such faking Prince. They are all happily married to their Price Charming or to the ones whom their parents thought are their kings. All of their faces glowed which a pride of having found their guy, and with a relief of having someone to take care of them all through their lives now. Their eyes sparkled with the smile from their heart and hopes in their mind. I wish them good luck and a very happy life.For all men - Woman is not for you to play with her feelings, she is sensitive to be sympathetic and empathetic for you, after all relationships like marriages are not just to share the bed, but also the ups and most importantly downs.

P.S

* Voice Recognition in Vista is amazing! - surprised abt it, considering it is from microsoft

* This blog - No offence intended. THis is my experience. May be there are nice guys too ( like most of my friends :)).

* 1 year. Since I quit cognizant. But ppl there still remember me :)